Calgon, Take me away!

So, today is the day after the day after Christmas.  My mom was away for two weeks staying with my brother.  She came back on Christmas Eve and we had a busy but fun holiday for the most part.  I was able to begin accomplishing things while my mom was away and now that she is here I am in stressed out mode again!

I try to logically convince myself that I should just let the little things go, but these little things drive me absolutely insane.  For instance, I know she is trying to "help" but she ends up just making more work for me when she washes the dishes. She NEVER uses soap. It drives me crazy! She also NEVER flushes the toilet, which totally grosses me out.  It's frustrating and embarrassing to have to wash my dishes before I offer someone a drink or a utensil for eating.  It also takes up so much more time. In addition to that, she puts things in places that I never know where they are. I just want to be able to do something in my kitchen without having to search for every supply I need.  It was nice to have space to myself in order to just relax and not worry about things being moved or without having "help."  You know, the kind of help that isn't really helpful.  This is just me venting right now. I wish I had a solution to not let myself be bothered by it, but some days it really gets to me. And on days like today when it's snowing outside and it's not so easy to just pop into my car and take a little ride, it's more frustrating.  I wish I could just ignore everything and feel comfortable to do the things I need to do, but it's difficult. If I have to store things outside of my room while I'm cleaning, I'm worried that she's going to move something and disrupt my progress.  It's an ongoing cycle and I know that I just need to get past this in order to move forward.

I know other people have things much worse and would rather have their parent, child, or family member with them.  It's just that I feel like I've lost a part of my mom already.  She's not the same mom in a lot of ways, but I still need to have more patience.  I just feel like I've made one step forward and two steps back at times.  While my mom was gone, I got rid of the carpet in her room that was nasty and stinky.  I worked on "de-stinking" her room and it had gotten better.  She's been back two days and it already stinks again.  I don't have a working washer and dryer in the house so I can't wash clothes easily and regularly for her or I would.  I did get her to take a shower today so that is a bonus but I need to figure out a clothes washing schedule. Ugh!

I will work on this problem and try to come up with some strategies to de-stress. I just am trying to get myself organized and everything she does is so disorganized! Some of this is the dementia, but some of this is what I have grown up with my entire life! Help Me Lord!